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Emperor's New Groove
Many times, it is possible to make a snap determination about a movie based on its trailer. Happily, in the case of The Emperor's New Groove, any such judgment is likely to be in error. That's because the trailer makes the movie seem like one of the worst excuses for animated entertainment to come along in the past decade. However, while The Emperor's New Groove isn't going to challenge Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, or The Lion King as the best of the "new wave" Disney animated features, it represents an entertaining (if inconsequential) 75 minutes spent in a theater. It's short and sweet - two adjectives I have not been able to use much this holiday season.
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Michael Apted is one of those rare, versatile filmmakers who can make mindless Hollywood blockbusters and thoughtful independent productions with equal aplomb. Apted's resume is as impressive as it is diverse, and has included a handful of critically praised documentaries, a James Bond movie (The World Is Not Enough), and an Oscar-nominated drama (Coal Miner's Daughter). Enough is Apted at his most commercial, and, unfortunately, his least compelling. This is a by-the-numbers thriller that doesn't even succeed on the most basic, visceral level. One can only hope that Apted is taking his salary for this effort and putting it into the next movie in the 7 Up series.
Shaun of the Dead
Shaun of the Dead is a spoof, but at the same time, it's a semi-serious horror movie. It's also an homage to George Romero's Dead series (Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead) and a societal commentary. Admittedly, with so many choices on the menu, director Edgar Wright cooks some of them better than others. But the bottom line is simple: Shaun of the Dead may not be consistently scary (in fact, it's almost never scary), but it is consistently funny (if you have a slightly warped sense of humor) and never loses its audience.
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In Her Shoes
Some movies are simply made for women, and heterosexual men have no hope of appreciating them, I suppose. Do you like shoes? False sentimentality? Something that mistakes generalizations for insight? Then In Her Shoes is the film for you. Curtis Hanson's slack follow-up to his rapper hero-worship outing, 8 Mile, is a disappointing look at sisterhood based on the chick novel by Jennifer Weiner. A frequently saccharine and false motion picture, In Her Shoes wants to elicit tears it never earns and tie everything together into a tidy bundle that leaves no cliché untouched. Artificial in both its dialogue and its construction, the film only works - on those occasions when it works - because of the sincere performance by the underrated Toni Collette.
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Barry Levinson had an idea, and a pretty good one at that: take an actor, have him assume the role of a vigilante, and, as public adulation of his assumed personae escalates, blur the line between being a vigilante and acting the part. Unfortunately, the idea is all that Levinson had, because the final result -- Jimmy Hollywood -- is a somnolent mess.
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Randy Rides Alone
In perhaps the most haunting opening of any B-Western, Randy Rides Alone has John Wayne enter a deserted saloon filled with corpses. To the tinny strains of a player-piano and with someone eerily peeking from behind a portrait of Ulysses S. Grant, Wayne's reconnaissance ends with his arrest for murder.
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During the operation Storm in Desert in Iraq, the tough Marine Sergeant of Special Operations MacPherson and his great pal and family man, the Mexican Corporal Miguel Silva, are seriously wounded and retired.
Molly Gunn (Brittany Murphy) is a carefree and fun-spirited girl, living as if she was a princess in a fairy tale. Her father was a popular rock-and-roll guitar player, who died in a plane crash with Molly's mother when she was a little girl. On her birthday in a nightclub, she meets Larraine "Ray" Schleine (Dakota Fanning), a hypochondriac and uptight young girl in a bathroom. Ray turns out to be the daughter of Roma Schleine (Heather Locklear), a well-known record company owner. There she also meets an ambitious Australian singer Neal (Jesse Spencer), who is trying to get Roma to sign him a record deal. Molly immediately falls for him and invites him to her apartment after the party. When at her apartment, Molly shows an amazed Neal the collection of guitars that her father left behind when he died. Bored by watching strange acts of Molly, such as owning a pet pig named Mu, eating Pez, speaking French, and various other things, he eventually leaves her for his career, but she doesn't give up on him.
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A struggling widower businessman finds a new tax loophole offered in Australia to same sex couples. Needing a tax break, he cajoles his best friend, also a widower, into filing papers indicating they are a gay couple living together and assuring him that the small town (population 652) they live in will never have a clue. However, their return letter from the government pops open and the town busybody soon has it spread all over town without the two mens knowledge. Meanwhile, the letter tells the men that a tax inspector will be coming to investigate their claim. The two decide they have to learn to act gay, so they get lessons from a local hair dresser and visit a gay nightclub in Sydney.
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A Brush with Death
Five high school cheerleaders drive out to a rural mansion to spend the weekend. They hear a thirty year-old urban legend about a young boy who killed his family and used their blood in his juvenile artwork. While exploring an old farmhouse on the property they discover that the boy never left his home and has grown into a sick and twisted man.
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In the Cold of the Night
Scott is a fashion photographer concerned about the sudden appearance of nightmares in his nightly dreams. In these, he seems to be involved in the murder of a beautiful young woman. When he actually meets this dreamwoman in reality, he begins to suspect that something strange must be responsible. As he attempts to solve the enigma of his troubling dreams, he is falling deeply in love with the mysterious woman. In the end, he uncovers a diabolical and sinister plot....
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A group of at-risk teens are sent to a what they think is a rehabilitation program on Fiji, but is really a prison-like camp where kids are abused and brainwashed.
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Will (Josh Hopkins), a charming 35-year-old Philadelphia ad man, heads to Lebanon, Pa. to bury his recently deceased father. He forms an unexpected friendship with CJ (Rachel Kitson), his bright, newly pregnant 17-year-old cousin. As Will becomes interested in CJs married teacher (Samantha Mathis) and CJ confronts her conflicted father, both struggle with formidable decisions about the path their lives will take. Can we vault our differences and meet in the middle? This bittersweet comic drama tenderly explores the cultural divide in America through the lives of one extended family.
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Last Man Standing
John Smith is an amoral gunslinger in the days of Prohibition. On the lam from his latest (unspecified) exploits, he happens upon the town of Jericho, Texas. Actually, calling Jericho a town would be too generous--it has become more like a ghost town, since two warring gangs have driven off all the decent folk. Smith sees this as an opportunity to play both sides off against each other, earning himself a nice piece of change as a hired gun. Despite his strictly avowed mercenary intentions, he finds himself risking his life for his, albeit skewed, sense of honor....
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Masters of Horror: Jenifer
While parked in a remote spot lunching Chinese food with his partner, Detective Frank Spivey saves a disfigured woman called Jenifer from being sliced with a meat cleaver by a deranged homeless man. He feels sorry for the retarded Jenifer, and takes her from an insane asylum and brings her home. Frank becomes obsessed for Jenifer, feeling lust and attraction for her lascivious body. When he realizes that she is a human beast, he moves with her to an isolated old cabin in the woods, with tragic consequences.
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Murder Loves Killers Too
Big Stevie has a sexual problem. Murder is how he has sex. And Big Stevie knows that there is no better way for a repressed killer to blow off steam than killing a bunch of care-free free-spirited teens. After her friends are all chopped, carved, and slashed, sweet young Aggie is left alone to face off against this unreasonable psycho. Now shes got a pervert on her hands. A big one. And Big Stevies problem could become Aggies problem real fast.
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