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Almost more than any other genre, comedy is virtually critic-proof, completely and utterly subjective in the face of your own sense of humor. Nine times out of ten, a black cat leaping out of an alley will scare most people. More often than not, a weepy scene between loved ones parted by either distance or death will elicit an audience's sympathy. But when it comes to comedy, unless there's simply nothing of good, old-fashioned, laugh-out-loud value, anything beyond a guy slipping on a banana peel or taking a shot to the nuts – which are universally funny – is ultimately at the mercy of taste. And so, it turns out, the absence of funny can be measured; the presence of funny is entirely up to you.
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I Am Legend
“Not if you were the last man on earth!” Plenty of guys have heard that line at some point in their lives, but it’s unlikely that Will Smith is one. His irresistible charm has been proved, above all, by his ability to attract audiences to bad movies like “Hitch” and “Wild Wild West,” as well as to better ones like “Ali” and “The Pursuit of Happyness.” In spite of its third-act collapse into obviousness and sentimentality, “I Am Legend” — in which Mr. Smith plays somebody with every reason to believe that he really is the last man on earth — is among the better ones.
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Shocking! Revolting! Sadistic! Sick! "Funny Games" is the most interesting movie experience I’ve ever had where sitting through the whole thing isn't necessarily required. I have a morbid curiosity to see how things turn out and so I’m too riveted to stop watching, even if the closing scene is an arbitrary plot note. This film isn’t about plot anyway; it’s about artistic statement.
Mongolian Death Worm
Films like Steven R. Monroe’s 2010 SyFy original “Mongolian Death Worm” aren’t very difficult to review. It’s pretty simple stuff: You either like it or you don’t. There isn’t anything to dissect, nothing to chew over. In fact, “Mongolian Death Worm” is even easier to grade than other low-budget creature features, as it falls under what I like to call the “Tremors Technique”. Instead of critiquing the picture in a traditional manner, I assess the situation and score it against “Tremors” and its sequels. Since the installments in that series are automatically arranged from best to worst — “Tremors”, of course, being the high water mark — assigning a sequel to a monster movie like “Mongolian Death Worm” is a relatively easy task to accomplish. After all, just about every post-”Tremors” giant worm movie owes at least one thing or another to Ron Underwood’s camp classic.
That’s not to say that “Mongolian Death Worm” can’t stand on its own two legs, because it certainly can. However, it wouldn’t be wise to expect anything remotely original or surprising from Monroe’s by-the-numbers sci-fi flick, especially if you’re well-versed in the “giant worm” subgenre. In fact, the only thing saving this cinematic invertebrate from sinking to the very bottom of the bargain bin is the tongue-in-cheek stupidity of its script and the unflappable Sean Patrick Flannery. The guy plays his part for all its worth, often chewing so much scenery in one take that his head appears ready to split wide open. When you know that he’s is capable of so much more — take a look at “Powder” or “Suicide Kings” if you need confirmation — it makes you appreciate his manic performance in “Mongolian Death Worm” that much more. He straddles that fine line like a pro.
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Pride is one of those generic inspirational sports movies that has been cobbled together from spare parts left to rust on Hollywood's shelf of clichés and stereotypes. Take a little '70s racism, add the guidance of a strong coach, throw in minor subplots about the players, and stir. Yet , despite the stale odor of the broth, lack of originality isn't Pride's stumbling point - it's that the familiar story is not well presented. The manipulation is clumsy and obvious and none of the characters attains a semblance of three-dimensionality. Even a solid performance by Terrence Howard can't keep Coach Jim Ellis from seeming like a shadow of the many more interesting men in whose footsteps he treads.
Secret Life of Bees
When it comes to movies that touch the heart, few have a more delicate yet undeniable impact than Gina Prince-Bythewood's The Secret Life of Bees. Adapted from the novel by Sue Monk Kidd, the production achieves something few literary interpretations succeed at: bringing out the inner voice of a character without resorting to an incessant voiceover. This is due in no small part to the mature, nuanced performance of Dakota Fanning, whose talent continues to develop as she ages. By resisting the temptation to over-emote, Fanning makes Lily an individual worthy of sympathy and admiration.
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I'm Not There
Few figures in 20th century music are more deserving of the label "enigma" than Bob Dylan. Reclusive, frequently misunderstood, and never pigeonholed into a niche, Dylan has remained a mercurial figure for the entirety of his long career. So when filmmaker Todd Haynes (Far from Heaven) announced he was going to make a film that would deconstruct Dylan, there was reason for optimism. Unfortunately, the muddled reality, called I'm Not There, doesn't live up to the promise. To capture the essence of a sometimes pretentious, occasionally unfathomable artist, Haynes has made a sometimes pretentious, occasionally unfathomable film. Dylan fans will love it for the music, but that's about all the production has going for it. In the end, many viewers will leave with two impressions: the music is as good as it always has been and Dylan is a bigger asshole than one might have suspected.
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Kekexili: Mountain Patrol
There are times when a movie looks a lot better on screen than it sounds from a description, and Kekexili: Mountain Patrol is an example. The one-sentence synopsis of the movie makes it sound like a dull, quasi-documentary conservationist picture when, in reality, it's a gritty, tightly paced film that pits man against man and man against nature. Director Lu Chuan took his lumps by filming the movie on location in an inhospitable locale, but his decision to do so is validated by the final result.
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Over the years, many films have taken a dark look at the supposedly perfect ideal of a white picket fence, a little house, and a nuclear family. For many, the suburban life is the American dream. For others, however, it can turn into a twisted nightmare of unfulfilled desires, repressed needs, and shattered hopes. Because of the necessity to keep up appearances, a serene facade often conceals a breeding ground for dysfunction, anxiety, and hypocrisy. Directors like David Lynch have made this their playground. Lynch in particular delights in depicting the root causes of social decay in suburbia - and he does it by autopsy. American Beauty is not as dark as a Lynch project, since it allows for small moments of redemption, but it mines the same general territory.
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The previews for Muriel's Wedding liken this latest Australian import to two of its predecessors, Strictly Ballroom and The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. These are inaccurate, not to mention misleading, comparisons. Those expecting something light and airy from this tragic-comedy are in for an unpleasant surprise, for, while Muriel's Wedding has its moments of exhilarating humor, it is, as often as not, downbeat and even mean-spirited.
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Dragon Tiger Gate
I am convinced that comic-to-film adaptations are possibly the single most difficult movies to make. There have been countless failures in Hollywood and Hong Kong over the years. It may have to do with audience expectations not being met, a colossal misinterpretation of the source material or just plain old bad filmmaking. Hollywood finally got wise to an extent by pairing talented filmmakers with both obscure and mainstream comic book heroes. They have been riding high on a string of successes that began with BLADE and looks to continue with 300. But as the recent release of GHOST RIDER has proven, there is no magic formula and for every success there are at least two critical, if not commercial flops. Unfortunately, Hong Kong’s DRAGON TIGER GATE falls into this latter category.
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Starts off with three mysterious people breaking a rod and then getting caught in the act of treason. It's General Zod, Ursa, and Non. They are proclaimed guilty. Backstory of Superman is shown. This backstory video about Superman is really good.
Clark Kent is such a nerdy dweeb. He's the perfect cover for Superman.
Margot Kidder looks strikingly similar to Courtney Cox-Arquette.
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The film is set in the North Country of Upstate New York, near the Akwesasne ('Where the Partridge Drums) St. Regis Mohawk Reservation and the Canadian border, shortly before Christmas. Ray Eddy (Melissa Leo) is a discount store clerk struggling to raise two sons with her husband, a compulsive gambler who has disappeared with the funds she had earmarked to finance the purchase of a double-wide mobile home. While searching for him, she encounters Lila Littlewolf (Misty Upham), a Mohawk bingo-parlor employee who is driving his car, which she claims she found abandoned with the keys in the ignition at the local bus-station. The two women, who have fallen on hard economic times, form a desperate and uneasy alliance and begin trafficking illegal immigrants from Canada into the United States across the frozen St. Lawrence River for $1200 each per crossing.
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The Three Seasons Bikini Team (April, May June) leave on a cross-country tour, but June sabotages the trip. They and the photographer end up in Pig Hollow, where Missy Sue is desperately looking for the deed to Ghost Gulch (where she lives with Pappy and Jeb). The evil Senator wants to find the deed first, so he can sell the land to the government for dumping nuclear waste. The girls end up giving their first ever topless show to raise the money to pay off the fake IRS bill produced by the Senator.
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Bad Girls from Mars
Someone is killing off the female leads of the movie production Bad Girls from Mars. The producers feel they should try to finish the film, even though theyre making a lucrative amount from insurance payoffs, so they fly in European sex bomb Emanuelle as the new lead. Emanuelle immediately begins embarrassing the producers by leading a wild party life around town. Meanwhile the killings continue, and detectives try to stop the fiend responsible.
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My Best Friend's Wedding
A woman who, by a promise made years earlier, is supposed to marry her best friend in three weeks, even though she doesnt want to. When she finds out that hes marrying someone else, she becomes jealous and tries to break off the wedding.
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