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She's Out of My League
**Recommended soundtrack to this review: Joe Jackson's "Is She Really Going Out With Him?" Cue it up on YouTube and then commence reading.**
The storyline of She's Out of My League is not a particularly new one. Average boy -- with average friends, average job, annoying family and ex-girlfriend -- meets Gorgeous Girl with great job, hot friends, perfect parents and a GQ/Fighter Pilot ex-boyfriend. Sparks, amazingly enough, fly. In League, the average guy is Kirk (played by Jay Baruchel, of Tropic Thunder, Knocked Up, and 2010's Sorcerer's Apprentice,) -- an unassuming "6" -- who works in airport security and one day, through a series of only slightly unbelievable events, finds himself meeting and dating the aforementioned perfect girl, Molly -- a "hard 10." Naturally, Kirk can't figure out why Molly is interested, so enter Kirk's knucklehead friends and family who offer no support, ridiculous advice, and eventually beat Kirk's self-confidence to a pulp... so much so that there's nothing left -- for Kirk or for Molly. Hilarity ensues. Really.
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At first glance, Yes Man appears to be yet another high-concept Jim Carrey comedy. After all, the premise can be summed up in a sentence: "A character played by Carrey in 'zany form' must say 'yes' to every proposal." Over the years, we have gotten used to these kinds of movies from the guy who was once best known as a Pet Detective, so one could not be faulted for assuming that Yes Man would be a lot like Liar, Liar and Bruce Almighty in tone and intent. However, while a viewer might be expecting a screwball, he/she ends up with a changeup. Because, despite all the funnyman Carrey trappings, this is, in essence, a fairly generic romantic comedy. Carrey does enough mugging at the beginning to fool us into thinking Yes Man is something other than what it is, but the minute Zooey Deschanel appears, the movie takes a left turn. Deschanel isn't just a token female love interest in a Carrey movie. She's a legitimate romantic foil. And that makes the movie a little different from how it's being sold.
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Mission: Impossible II
For those who didn't get enough of James Bond late last year when The World Is Not Enough blazed its way into theaters, Mission: Impossible II offers a chance to once again get shaken and stirred. Oh, the film isn't an official entry into the durable British spy's cannon, but anyone who can't recognize the 007 formula when they see it hasn't been paying attention. With few changes (an actor here, a name there), Mission: Impossible II could easy double as Bond 20. And, for those who have trouble envisioning Tom Cruise as a top-of-the-line action hero (the original Mission: Impossible left many doubting Thomases, including me), this movie should erase lingering uncertainties.
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In some ways, The Town can be considered a throwback, at least insomuch as any movie reflecting the approach of '80s and '90s cop dramas can be tagged with such a label. With a crisp, clear style and a focus on character, director Ben Affleck is able to imbue staple action scenes with a sense of urgency and tension. Take, for example, what could be a routine car chase. Because of the way it's shot, the viewer finds himself unexpectedly caught up in the excitement. On paper, the scene might be generic; on screen, it's more than that. The same can be said about many elements of The Town. The pieces and parts assembled herein are familiar, but the manner in which Affleck puts them together results in an engrossing two hours of cinema. Few will depart from a showing of The Town overwhelmed, but neither will they be dissatisfied by the experience.
Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot
By-the-book macho Los Angeles supercop Joe Bamowski played by Stallone gets his high-pressure life on the edge complicated by his overprotective visiting elderly mother (Getty). The obscenely preposterous bad sitcom plot has him partnering up with her to investigate a smarmy crime lord (Rees). Along the way his mom teaches him to open up to the woman he loves (Jobeth Williams), another cop who happens to be his superior.
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Liffey (Kelly Reilly), an ambitious young architect, moves to an isolated and eerie Irish valley to build a modern piece of architecture. The ruined cottage and land that she will use are a gift from her fiancé Richard, and is the former home of Molly, the elderly matriarch of a farming family living on the other side of the woods. Molly’s daughter is Mabs (Miranda Richardson), herself mother of three girls and wife to farmer Tucker.
Diary of a Sex Addict
A middle-aged chef in a luxurious restaurant reveals to his shrink his double personality He is an impeccable family man who loves his wife and son and at the same time a sexually hungry person who seeks pleasure at any time with any woman.
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The film's first scene shows Mona Dearly (Bette Midler) leaving her home and trying in vain to unlock her car. Her keys fit her son's car, so she takes that and drives off. In a bend, the brakes fail completely and she drives off a cliff into the Hudson River. This is observed by Clarence, who is fishing there. Chief Wyatt Rash (Danny DeVito) later observes that there are no skid marks on the road.
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Five tales of terror to quench your thirst for horror...
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Young, innocent, and quirky June, a violinist, spends her days working in an oddball Venice coffee shop, her nights rehearsing for a professional music career, and all-hours daydreaming about the beautiful man thats destined just for her. When she actually meets him in her own apartment building, she finds out Jack is engaged to the quintessential gorgeous bitch, Quinn. The conflict ensues and the romance is tested. Whether its indulging her loony Grandma through rehearsals of her own funeral, or dealing with the overzealous video-store manager and his crush, June stumbles through her potential love life, her best friend Mary at her side.
When buxom Susan gets killed, the only suspect is husband Rick. He soon admits cheating on her with various women from Internet fantasy chat rooms. It all started when buxom Sasha wanted to strip for him via web-cam. Alas, bra-less Sasha then found his address expecting the same service, while Ricks wife was shopping. The second woman was The Stranger, who wanted sex in a gym and later threatened in vain to expose Rick if they break up. The third woman was park worker Beth who wanted sex in the wild. The fourth woman had sex with Rick in a hotels bridal sweet, letting her friend, no less than Susans identical twin, Jenny, secretly peep from the closet. The fifth woman Cora was slightly less buxom than Sasha, but actually wanted Ricks wife home in another room. The sixth woman Desiree wanted him in a blindfold. The seventh and last woman Molly pretended delivering Rick pizza. Susans identical twin, Jenny, eventually reveals she became Desiree to trick Rick into sex. Rick wants to turn her in, but she pulls her gun out. Luckily, the detective forgot his pen.
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Labor Pains stars Lindsay Lohan as much-abused secretary Thea Dixon, whose boss makes her clean his dog when it rolls in poop. On the brink of being fired, Thea makes a desperate claim Shes pregnant! Fear of a lawsuit prevails and she keeps her job... but now shes got to keep up her story.
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Jack Walsh is a former cop from Chicago, who was framed by criminal he was investigating and about to arrest. He is now a bounty hunter based in Los Angeles. His boss wants him to find, Jonathan The Duke Mardukas, an accountant, who was working for Las Vegas mobster, who stole millions of dollars from him and gave it away. His boss was the one who bailed him out, and now unless he can get him back in L.A. in the next 5 days, he will forfeit the bond and be placed out of business. So he sends Jack to get him, which is Midnight Run or easy job in the bail bond business. Except for the fact that the man The Duke stole the money from, wants to get him, and he is also the same man who framed Jack. And also the FBI wants to get Mardukas so that they can use him to get his boss, so they warn Walsh not to get in their way. But Walsh nevertheless finds The Duke and is about bring him back but when Mardukas claims that he has difficulty with flying the airline throws them out of the plane, so they have to go back on the road. When Walshs boss, learns that he didnt arrive when he was suppose to, he sends another bounty hunter, Marvin, who is Jacks greatest adversary, to get Mardukas. And when Marvin cancels Walshs card, they dont have enough funds to make it all the way, so they have to scrape everything they have. And it doesnt help that Mardukas is doing everything he can to escape, cause he says that his former boss can get him even in jail.
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Make-Out with Violence
MAKE-OUT with VIOLENCE is a genre-bending tale of a boy trying to fulfill his unrequited love for a girl who has risen from the dead. It tells the story of twin brothers Patrick and Carol Darling, newly graduated from high school and struggling to come to terms with the mysterious disappearance of their friend, the bright and beautiful Wendy Hearst. When a drive through the countryside surrounding their suburban community leads to the discovery of Wendys mysteriously animated corpse, the boys secretly transport the un-dead Wendy to an empty house in hopes of somehow bringing her back to life. As the sweltering summer pushes on, they must maintain the appearance of normalcy for their friends and family as they search for ways to revive the Wendy they once knew, or, failing that, to satisfy their own quests for love amongst the living and the dead.
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Made for Each Other
The best part of any marriage is consummating it. However after 3 months of a sexless marriage Dan, in a moment of weakness, finds himself in the throws of casual sex with another woman. Dan decides the only way to morally rectify this is of course to get his wife to cheat on him and thus he sets out to find the right man to put the hurt on his old lady.
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Naked in New York
Naked in New York begins in the car of grown up Jake, he is talking to us about his girlfriend, Joanne, (watch for the facial expressions) and to whom you can turn to for help while facing life (your parents, nyaa, I dont think so). From there it flashes back to his memories of his parents, college, house across from a squirrel infested peanut factory, best friend, writing career and Joanne.
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