Dead Cert

Dead Cert
Given the seemingly never ending popularity of the Brit gangster film, it was always inevitable that sooner or later someone would take the next logical step and combine it with the horror genre. “Dead Cert” does just that, following in the footsteps of Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriquez’s classic “Dusk Till Dawn” by throwing vampires into the mix. Directed by Steve Lawson (“Just For The Record”), the film comes with a cast list that reads like a who’s who of Brit genre talent, including Craig Fairbrass (“Rise Of The Footsoldier”), Billy Murray (“Essex Boys”), Dexter Fletcher (“Kick-Ass”), Steven Berkoff (“44 Inch Chest”), Dave Legeno (“Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince”), top character actor Jason Flemying (“Clash Of The Titans”) and even a bonus in the form of a cameo, from the one and only Danny Dyer (“Basement”). The film now arrives on DVD via Momentum Pictures, coming complete with a making of featurette and audio commentary.

Fairbass plays the titular Freddie ‘Dead Cert’ Frankham, a former crook trying to turn respectable and take a few steps up the ladder by opening up a sleazy London nightclub. Unfortunately for Freddie and his various underworld pals, said club just happens to be on the site of an ancient Black Church, established back in the 17th Century by a Romanian vampire warlord imaginatively called The Wolf. On the opening night of the club the evil one returns in his new guise as a feared Romanian drug lord, determined to rest his former seat of power back from Freddie and his goons and start an all new reign of darkness.

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Quarantine

Quarantine
It has become tiresome to travel to a multiplex seemingly every other Friday to see the latest remake of a foreign horror film. For the most part, the problem isn't that these productions are remakes but that they're bad remakes. In some cases, that's because the source material isn't good and in some cases it's because something is broken in the translation. The reason the term "remake" has developed a negative connotation isn't because the re-imagination of a story in another era or for a different culture is inherently flawed but because so many of them are produced without any concern for intelligence or artistry. Quarantine is an English-language remake of the 2007 Spanish horror film [Rec]. While the films are in many ways similar (with certain shots and passages of dialogue being identical), Quarantine fails to correct some of the problems evident in its predecessor while also incorporating a few defects of its own.

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Nativity Story

Nativity Story
There are two ways in which one can consider The Nativity Story. As a piece of religious instruction or an animated version of a crèche, it accomplishes its aims. As a movie, however, it's slow, plodding, and not terribly interesting. There's also an unmistakable whiff of exploitation to be found. Although I'm sure the people directly involved with the making of the movie came to it with the best intentions, one can scent what smells suspiciously like greed coming from the corporate level. (Keep in mind that New Line Cinema is best known for its horror franchises - it owns both Freddy and Jason.) The desire to ride The Passion of the Christ's coattails is understandable - that movie was a bona fide blockbuster. However, The Nativity Story isn't in the same league. It's an uninspired re-telling of a Bible story that every Christian knows by heart.

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Motorcycle Diaries

Motorcycle Diaries
Before he became the leader of the Cuban Revolution, Che Guevara was an introverted medical student living a sheltered life in Buenos Aires. His life changed in 1952, when, despite almost being done with his degree, he decided to take a break from his studies and join his friend, Alberto Granado, on a trip through South America. Their journey, begun on an old motorcycle and completed on foot, by hitchhiking, and on a raft, took more than seven months and covered 7500 miles. By the time it concluded in Caracas, Guevara was not the same man who started the odyssey. The Motorcycle Diaries, which is based on Guevara's journals and a book written by Granado, is the story of that trek.

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Tomb Raider

Tomb Raider
It's not Casablanca, or even Die Hard, for that matter. But then no one expected it to be. What Tomb Raider can claim is that it's the best computer game-turned-motion picture to date. A backhanded compliment? To be sure, but at least the experience of sitting in a theater watching this movie doesn't create a longing for the interactivity of actually playing the game. Unlike nearly every other Hollywood product based on a computer/video game, Tomb Raider seems more like the summer blockbuster that it strives to be than a 90-minute big-screen commercial. (Then again, when it comes to product placement, you can't get any more obvious.)

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Beauty and the Beast

Beauty and the Beast
Walt Disney's 1991 instant classic, Beauty and the Beast, is not only the finest animated movie ever made, but deserves a prominent position on any list of all-time greats. Although not the highest grossing Disney production, nor the best-remembered by most kids (those honors go to The Lion King), Beauty and the Beast nevertheless earned the most enthusiastic notices ever by the critics and was recognized with a Best Picture Oscar nomination (considering the weak competition, it deserved to win the award). The studio knew early in development that it had a winner. In an unprecedented move, Disney screened a 70% complete work print to a packed auditorium at the 1991 New York Film Festival months before the movie was finished. The astounding reception helped to build a sense of anticipation that was unrivaled since the days of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.

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Mute Witness

Mute Witness
It's not often that a slasher/thriller is released by a recognized distributor of art-house fare (in this case, Sony Pictures Classics), but that's the case with Mute Witness. Of course, it's somewhat unfair to pigeon-hole this movie by using the word "slasher", since that term conjures images of Friday the Thirteenth, and this picture aims considerably higher. In approach and execution, if not in content, Mute Witness belongs in the same category as another low-budget edge-of-the-seater: The Stepfather.

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Happiness Is a Warm Blanket, Charlie Brown

Happiness Is a Warm Blanket, Charlie Brown
I must admit I was a bit dubious about this new special for it was the 1st one without the great and late Bill Melendez. It seems Lee Mendelson was not involved either, but Schulz' son was. This one stood out from all the other post-Schulz era specials for its '60s style. As a comic-strip fan I appreciate attention to detail. The "classic" effect obtained through the retro animation worked out pretty well, bringing some nostalgia. The story development was somewhat modern, deeper, beyond previous attempts, and yet kept all the action faithful to the Peanuts world and spirit. The gags were delightfully funny, they cracked me up quite a few times. I simply loved the use of one of the most famous Beethoven symphonies, but I won't spoil it for you. Not only the music, but the way they managed to create a matching animated treat, was indeed a creative highlight.

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Biker Boyz

Biker Boyz
In the world of underground motorcycle clubs, the undefeated racer known as Smoke (Laurence Fishburne) is the undisputed "King of Cali." But Smoke's dominance of the set is about to be threatened by a young motorcycle racing prodigy called Kid (Derek Luke), who is determined to win Smoke's helmet and earn the coveted title.

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Fat Albert

Fat Albert
The film opens with an animated sequence featuring Fat Albert (Kenan Thompson) performing the original series' theme song "Gonna Have A Good Time".

In real life, Doris (Kyla Pratt) is a sad teenager still recovering from the death of her grandfather and she's ignoring her foster sister, Lauri's (Dania Ramirez), efforts to bring her a social life. Upon learning that her parents will be away for the weekend, Doris sadly lets a tear hit her TV remote, as the Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids is on. The tear opens up the TV world to the real world and Fat Albert jumps out of the tv, thinking she has a problem. Then Rudy, Dumb Donald, Mushmouth, Bucky and Old Weird Harold jump out of the tv. Bill tells Russell to stay put and jumps out of the tv. Doris insists that she is fine, but the gang wants to stay - their show is over and they have to wait until the next day's show to go back. They follow Doris to school the next day and are amazed by the new technology like laptops and the internet.

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Opportunity Knocks

Opportunity Knocks
Eddie and Lou are a couple of two-bit con men on the lam from a loan shark. They hide out in someones house and they hear on the answering machine that (A) the owner of the house is out of the country for a month or two and (B) the housesitter supposed to watch the house for the absent owner wont be able to watch the house due to a new job in another part of the country. This provides for a pretty nifty arrangement for Eddie and Lou...until the relatives of the house owner drop by to visit. Eddie quickly adopts the guise of the person supposedly housesitting for the owner, and the shenanigans start from there.

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King Frat

King Frat
Set on the quiet campus of Yellowstream University, this comedy follows the rivalries that build between two of the colleges fraternities. When theyre not mooning everyone they pass and throwing garbage on the lawns of rival frats, the members of the Pi Kappa Delta fraternity are mainly interested in drinking and... well, drinking. When a campus- wide farting contest is announced, Grossout, the leader of the Deltas, is all too eager to stand up, bend over and defend the honor of his fraternity.

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Endure

Endure
After a shocking photo of a young woman is found inside the twisted metal of a fatal car crash, veteran detective Emory Lloyd must risk everything to identify and find the woman before its too late.

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End Game

End Game
A secret Service agent and a news reporter investigate the conspiracy behind the assassination of the President.

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Johnny Mnemonic

Johnny Mnemonic
In 2021, the whole world is connected by the gigantic Internet, and almost a half of the population is suffering from the Nerve Attenuation Syndrome (NAS).Johnny with an inplanted memory chip in his brain was ordered to transport the over loaded information from Beijing to Newark. While Pharmakom Industries supported by yakuza tries to capture him to get the informaiton back, the Low-tech group led by J-Bone tries to break the missing code to download the cure of NAS which Johnny carries.

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Life
In the mid-1990s, two inmates bury the burned bodies of two lifers at Mississippis infamous Parchman Farm a third old-timer relates their story. Theyd served 65 years for a murder they didnt commit, framed by a local sheriff while buying moonshine whiskey for a Manhattan club owner to whom they owed money. In flashbacks we see this odd couple thrown together (Ray is a fast-talking con man, and Claude is a serious man about to start work as a bank teller), the loss of Rays watch (sterling silver, from his daddy), the murder and trial, the hardships of Parchman, and the love-hate relationship of Claude and Ray as they spend 65 years bickering and looking for a way to escape.

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