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By the time this review is over, I will have spent more time thinking about Fool's Gold than the writers of its script. This...thing...is one of the sloppiest pictures released by a major studio in recent memory. What can you say about a "romance" with no romance, a "comedy" with no laughs, an "adventure" with no excitement? Though I certainly wasn't rubbing my hands together in anticipation walking in to the theater, I thought this would at least succeed at being an enjoyable time waster. "Attractive people wearing few clothes in exotic locales -- I can handle watching that for a few hours," I thought to myself. But I was wrong. So very wrong. The whole affair is about as compelling as a two-hour fart.
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You Don't Mess with the Zohan
Let me be blunt: “You Don’t Mess With the Zohan” is the finest post-Zionist action-hairdressing sex comedy I have ever seen. That it is the only one I have ever seen — and why is that? what cultural deficiency or ideological conspiracy has prevented this genre from flourishing? — does not much detract from my judgment.
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If you were unfortunate enough to see DARKNESS in U.S. theatres in late 2004 or UK theatres in 2005, you didn't see it, simple as that. No, you instead saw what Dimension thought they could get the most cash for. Meaning, the film was edited heavily for both objectionable content and to fit in more snugly to a short attention span running time. In all, Dimension cut nearly fifteen minutes from the original running time. With Dimension's way, they over-dubbed any foul language, toned down some of the more frightening scenes and threw out some sequences altogether. This way, the film was cleared with a "PG-13" rating and fit nicely into a two hour running time, when you consider the half hour of trailers and soda commercials theatre patrons are forced to sit through, that is. So, much as everyone trashed the film on its U.S. release, your judgments are not for DARKNESS, sorry to say. You can't judge a film that has been chopped up to this extent. Two minutes of excised gore won't save a turkey like , but fifteen minutes makes a world of difference. You may have some harsh words to say about Dimension's butchery, but the original cut is another story.
Never Back Down
Strictly speaking, Never Back Down is not a remake, but it might as well be. The premise is familiar: underdog achieves self respect through training with a master then puts it all together for the big fight. Like a pop song suffering from overplay, Never Back Down hits all the expected notes but feels tired and stirs no emotion. When one considers where Million Dollar Baby took this concept, it becomes all the more depressing how little creativity exists in Never Back Down's DNA. There's no reason to see this film - everyone in the audience knows not only what the starting and finishing points are but the trajectory that will propel events from one to the other. Those with a craving for the story would be better off re-watching The Karate Kid than enduring this lackluster re-telling.
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With next year's Oscar nominations set squarely in its sights, Finding Forrester arrives in theaters at the right time of the year (December) with the right kind of star power (Sean Connery, F. Murray Abraham, Anna Paquin) and the sort of feel-good story that audiences and Academy members appreciate. For director Gus Van Sant, this is the second time he has dipped into the well of inspirational storytelling; Finding Forrester displays numerous similarities to Good Will Hunting. And, even though the film's overall trajectory is formulaic, Van Sant does a good job of holding our attention for the two-plus hour running length.
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Fugitive Pieces was accorded the honor of opening the 2007 Toronto International Film Festival, and it became the latest in a long line of Opening Night movies to have trouble securing a distributor. After an eight month interval after its World Premiere, the movie is being given a small U.S. Distribution by Samuel Goldwyn Films. What was worth missing in Toronto is worth missing at a local art house. In a word, Fugitive Pieces can be described as “forgettable.” The film has lofty goals, but comes across as leaden and pretentious. It’s a character study in which the lead participant is the least interesting person in the movie. There’s something inherently frustrating and unsatisfying about that. As a viewer, you want to become involved in this man’s life but the film never takes you to a point where that’s possible. This is a fatal flaw.
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An understanding of how society uses - and, more importantly, misuses - the term "monster" offers crucial insight into the intentions of first time filmmaker Patty Jenkins. Without offering justifications or excuses, Jenkins seeks to provide some understanding of the underlying motivation of serial killer Aileen Wuornos, a prostitute who murdered seven men during 1989. She was subsequently tried, found guilty, and executed in 2002. By exploring details primarily from Wuornos' viewpoint (Jenkins spent considerable time with the convicted killer while she was on death row, and uses excerpts from Wuornos' letters for the film's voiceover narratives), Monster eschews the easy path of transforming her into a one-dimensional psycho. Instead, without diminishing the horror of her actions, the picture humanizes Wuornos, developing a three-dimensional character where one might not normally expect to find one.
Filmmaker Pedro Almodovar (Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown, Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!) never does anything in a conventional manner, and Kika is no exception. A black farce on sex, violence, and the attraction of both for the general public, Kika is one of those films that causes the MPAA to get nervous. As a result, this admittedly-explicit motion picture was given an NC-17. October Films, however, decided against cutting the print to get an R or using the NC-17, and instead released Kika without a rating.
It's All About Love
The time is out of joint its July, 2021, but snow falls in New York City, people freeze in Uganda, gravity has lost its power in parts of Africa, and hearts give out suddenly. John, an academic on his way to Calgary, stops in New York to meet his wife Elena, a world-renowned skater, at the airport for a quick signing of divorce papers. Instead, she sends bodyguards who take John to her hotel where he catches whiffs of a plot that may place her in mortal danger. Can he trust her brother, Michael? Meanwhile, his own brother, Marciello, circles the globe in a plane observing the onset of global winter. Is there a corner of the world where love is safe?
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A teenage boy befriends an escapee from a mental institution who sees visions of horrible murders being committed.
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I Love Karditsa
A leading Greek scholar in the early 70, New York, the first human clones, the Greek Greg Kania, from Karditsa, making Mike Kania. In America in the 21st century, Mike stopped one night for cigarettes and falls victim to theft. Having lost 30,000,000, is faced with the Mafia. To survive, we must go in Karditsa and change places with the clone. Gregory, a typical Greek province, is embroiled in a number of erotic intrigue and look how much money to give free course work. A sexy blonde with a big check is the perfect bait ...
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Addict actor and producer, Mark, is brought against his will from London to the rehab clinic Vista Clara run by psychologists Bill and his wife Kelly. Mark is addicted to drugs, booze and sex, and joins a few other drug addicts. When the treatment program requires the presence of their families, the clinic invites Marks wife Jane while Mark sends a private invitation to his girlfriend Pamela. The triangle of lovers brings friction between the women while Bill and Kelly have also problems in their relationship. After a fire, the truth about love and commitment is disclosed in Vista Clara.
After Kelly Reyes and her teammate lose a close semi-final match in the Association of Volleyball Professionals championship, a print journalist, Holden Grant, wants to interview her. He says that losers comments are more interesting than winners. The interview leads to dinner and a night together. News comes that one of the women on the team that defeated Kelly has died in a hit-and-run accident. Kelly takes her place on the team that will play in the championship in two weeks, the police investigation into the hit-and-run discloses that Kelly may be in grave danger, and Holden may not be what he says. A murderer is out there waiting for the championship game.
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Land of the Blind
A political drama about terrorism, revolution, and the power of memory. In an unnamed place and time, an idealistic soldier named Joe strikes up an illicit friendship with a political prisoner named Thorne, who eventually recruits him into a bloody coup detat. But in the post-revolutionary world, what Thorne asks of Joe leads the two men into bitter conflict, spiraling downward into madness until Joes co-conspirators conclude that they must erase him from history.
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Its gone to the dogs... in a BIG way!
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No Right Turn
A haunting fairy-tale thriller set between snowy landscapes and a neon city.
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