Serious Moonlight

Serious Moonlight
“Serious Moonlight” suggests an unholy, watered-down hybrid of “The Ref” and “Funny Games,” played as a chirpy screwball comedy, if you can imagine something so bizarre.

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Magic Man

Magic Man
A serial killer thriller about a woman, the daughter of a slain magician's assistant, setting about to learn the truth behind her mother's death and encountering a Las Vegas illusionist who may be a cunning serial killer. Sounds simple enough, so why is it such a mess? Scenes that serve no purpose, subplots that go nowhere, an unfocused script boasting some of the flattest dialogue this side of Dragon Wars. Good actors relegated to nothing roles while very bad no-name actors get the meatier parts. The most elaborate scene of action being a foot chase between two middle-aged men huffing and puffing along the second floor of a motel balcony. Either Magic Man was one of those productions where things went horribly awry somewhere along the way or there was just so much behind-the-scenes ineptitude that the movie was doomed from the outset.

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Fool's gold

Fool's gold
By the time this review is over, I will have spent more time thinking about Fool's Gold than the writers of its script. This...thing...is one of the sloppiest pictures released by a major studio in recent memory. What can you say about a "romance" with no romance, a "comedy" with no laughs, an "adventure" with no excitement? Though I certainly wasn't rubbing my hands together in anticipation walking in to the theater, I thought this would at least succeed at being an enjoyable time waster. "Attractive people wearing few clothes in exotic locales -- I can handle watching that for a few hours," I thought to myself. But I was wrong. So very wrong. The whole affair is about as compelling as a two-hour fart.

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Sin Nombre

Sin Nombre
The dream is reaching America. The nightmare is undertaking the journey to get there. But you know your current circumstances aren't too promising when New Jersey is represented as a paradise. Writer/director Cary Fukunaga's film is about illegal immigration only on the surface, and almost none of its running time transpires within the boundaries of the United States. Instead, it's about the factors that cause some individuals to risk incarceration, deportation, and even death for a chance to cross the border and escape cycles of poverty, disempowerment, and gang violence.

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Tomb Raider

Tomb Raider
It's not Casablanca, or even Die Hard, for that matter. But then no one expected it to be. What Tomb Raider can claim is that it's the best computer game-turned-motion picture to date. A backhanded compliment? To be sure, but at least the experience of sitting in a theater watching this movie doesn't create a longing for the interactivity of actually playing the game. Unlike nearly every other Hollywood product based on a computer/video game, Tomb Raider seems more like the summer blockbuster that it strives to be than a 90-minute big-screen commercial. (Then again, when it comes to product placement, you can't get any more obvious.)

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The Ghost and the Darkness

The Ghost and the Darkness
In 1898, Sir Robert Beaumont (Tom Wilkinson), the primary financier of a railroad project in Tsavo, Kenya, is furious because the project is running behind schedule. He seeks out the expertise of John Henry Patterson (Val Kilmer), a military engineer, to get the project back on track. Patterson travels by train to Tsavo, where he meets supervisors Angus Starling (Brian McCardie) and Samuel (John Kani), a native African (and the film's narrator), and the doctor, David Hawthorne (Bernard Hill). Hawthorne tells Patterson of a recent lion attack. That night, Patterson kills an approaching lion with one shot, earning the respect of the workmen. The project gets back on schedule. However, not long afterwards Mahina (Henry Cele), the construction foreman, is dragged from his tent in the middle of the night. His half-eaten body is found the next morning. Patterson then attempts a second night-time lion hunt, but the next morning another worker is found dead at the opposite end of the camp from Patterson's position.

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Run for the Money

Run for the Money
For me, there are not many films that are just unbearable to see, especially when talented actors are involved. "Hard Cash" is just hard to watch, as you see Christian Slater, Val Kilmer, and Daryl Hannah slumming it out in roles you would normally see Treat Williams in. How these actors got caught in this reject of a film is beyond me!

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Good Burger

Good Burger
Kenan Thompson and Kel Mitchell, stars of the popular Nickelodeon series All That, confront the ogre of faceless corporate tyranny and have fun doing it in this comedy for young people. Ed (Mitchell) is a teenager who lives for his job at Good Burger, a small but friendly neighborhood hamburger stand, while his buddy Dexter (Thompson) also works there, but lack Ed's single-minded devotion to his job -- he's there because he accidentally destroyed the car of his teacher Mr. Wheat (Sinbad) and has to raise money to pay the damages.

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Behind Enemy Lines: Colombia

Behind Enemy Lines: Colombia
Colombia is in chaos, as a 5 man team of US Navy SEALS embark on a secret mission to ensure that peace talks between the country's government and insurgent guerillas don't erupt into violence, an unforeseen complication threatens all out war.

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Clubland

Clubland
Life for shy 21-year-old Tim Maitland (Khan Chittenden) is not always smooth sailing. His mum Jean (Brenda Blethyn) is a cafeteria worker by day who hits the comedy club circuit by night, while his dad John (Frankie J. Holden) is busy trying to recapture his fifteen minutes of fame from when he was a country and western singer back in 1975. But when the feisty beautiful Jill (Emma Booth) walks into Tim's life, things seem to be looking up. Unfortunately, there's another woman in Tim's life, one who will stand between him and the perfect romance... his mother!

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Next Day Air

Next Day Air
Leo works for Next Day Air (NDA), a package delivery company, but is going to get fired for any more mistakes. While delivering a package addressed to Jesus in apartment 303, Leo accidentally delivers it to apartment 302. Before Leo can leave Jesus asks if Leo has the package and gets worried when he is empty handed. Guch and Brody, two inept criminals, open the package and find ten bricks of cocaine hidden in a clay pot. Brody remembers that his cousin, Shavoo, has cut cocaine before. Shavoo and his partner, Buddy, come to Guch's apartment and settle on $15,000 a brick.

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The Women

The Women
Clothing designer Mary Haines lives in a beautiful suburban Connecticut home with her wealthy financier husband Steven and their 11-year-old daughter Molly. Her best friend since college, Sylvie Fowler, is the editor of a prominent fashion magazine that dictates the latest in taste and style for New York City fashionistas. When Sylvie learns Steven is involved with Crystal Allen, a perfume salesgirl in Saks Fifth Avenue, from chatty manicurist Tanya, she confides in the ever-pregnant Edie Cohen but hesitates to tell Mary, who discovers the news herself from the same woman after getting a manicure herself. Despite her mother Catherine's exhortation to keep quiet about what she knows and a holiday away, Mary confronts first Crystal in a department store and then Steven before asking for a divorce.

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Doc Hollywood

Doc Hollywood
Benjamin Stone is a young doctor driving to L.A where he was offered a new job as a plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills. He gets off the highway to avoid a traffic jam, but gets lost and ends up crashing into a fence in the small town of Grady. He is sentenced to 32 hrs of community service at the local hospital. All he wants is to serve the sentence and get moving, but gradually the locals become attached to the new doctor, and he falls for the pretty ambulance driver, Lou. Will he leave?

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Leprechaun in the Hood

Leprechaun in the Hood
Hes been in the country side, hes been downtown, hes been to Las Vegas, hes even been in space, now that evil Leprechaun is in DA HOOD! Three young rap artists are looking for a break. They need money to buy some music equipment so they can go to Las Vegas and enter a contest. They meet up with a local pimp named Mack Daddy who agrees to hook them up, but later declines. The rappers want to get even with him so one night they break into Macks place and steal alot of his jewelry, gold, and even the medallion off an ugly looking statue. Shouldnt have done that! Because without the medallion, the state transforms into the Leprechaun, who goes on a killing spree once again looking for his missing gold, once again! And the song says it all, theres nothin scarier than a Lep in the hood!

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Miss Nobody

Miss Nobody
A mild-mannered secretary discovers that she has a talent for murder as she ascends the corporate ladder.

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Marilyn Hotchkiss' Ballroom Dancing & Charm School

Marilyn Hotchkiss' Ballroom Dancing & Charm School
Dance is a very powerful drug, if embraced judiciously to reap its rewards, one must shoulder its challenges with intrepid countenance. Frank Keene, a grieving baker in a near catatonic state, happens on a car accident. The loquacious and insightful victim, Steve Mills, is on his way to an appointment in Pasadena with a years-ago acquaintance he asks Frank to go in his place. Its a dance class. Frank goes, to find Steves friend. The story moves back and forth among Steves childhood, the scene of the accident, and the aftermath of Franks first Lindy hop. Black eyes, group therapy, loneliness, boys being boys, roads not taken, and saying good-bye color the story.

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