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Drive Angry 3D
While an incredibly fun and original genre movie is very, very welcome in the midst of this particularly dim winter for wide releases, here’s the shame of it: Late this April, “summer” will kick off with the fifth entry of a tired and often obnoxiously dumb series built around fast cars. Really, there’s only the slimmest of chances it’s better than Patrick Lussier and Todd Farmer’s 3D revenge road movie, which is much more befitting of signifying the beginning of hot weather, short shorts and sweet times.
To know DRIVE ANGRY is to love it. It’s brief opening narration from William Fichtner’s The Accountant (who steals the film) musing on the fates of bad-ass motherf**kers sets a stage built on pyrotechnics and the bones of lesser men. The film very much stars Nicolas Cage as John Milton, who after escaping hell is on a singular mission to eradicate the cult leader (Billy Burke as Jonah King) who murdered his daughter and stole her baby. He finds feisty companionship in ex-waitress Piper (Amber Heard) as they charge towards the site of the infant’s sacrifice under the full moon, with many misadventures along the way.
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From Stephan Elliott, the man who brought us The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert comes Easy Virtue, an adaptation of Noel Coward's play. Written in 1924, this was the playwright's 16th play, and was originally filmed in 1928 by Alfred Hitchcock. The thing about Coward's work, whether in its unexpurgated version or in this new, re-tooled approach, is it's all about the dialogue. (Ironically, the Hitchcock adaptation was silent, resulting in much of the dialogue being excised.) Sure, there's a plot, but it's a secondary element to the lines the actors deliver. Only Oscar Wilde has the same bite. Fortunately, Elliott understands this, which makes Easy Virtue go down smoothly.
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Red Eye belongs to the genre in which a director attempts to sustain a heightened level of suspense for long enough that the audience will not notice how incredibly stupid the screenplay is. Alfred Hitchcock was a master at this - although some of the scripts he worked with were masterpieces, one could argue that his true skill as a filmmaker was evident with those that weren't. More recently, Phone Booth and Cellular achieved success by doing as much as possible with a thin and implausible premise. Wes Craven's Red Eye is more of a mixed bag. There are stretches during the course of this 85-minute long motion picture when the director elevates the tension to an acceptable plateau, but there are also occasions when too much of the narrative seeps through and we see the seams in the storytelling.
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Autumn in New York
When MGM elected not to screen Autumn In New York for film critics, the decision touched off a minor controversy. First, stars Richard Gere and Winona Ryder spoke out publicly against this move, claiming it was an insult to the integrity of their film (director Joan Chen wisely declined to comment). The MGM execs countered with the disingenuous claim that the decision had nothing to do with their opinion of the movie's quality; they didn't want critics revealing the "surprise ending" (for the record, there is nothing surprising about the ending). In reality, the distributor was trying to avoid making an open declaration of "no confidence." However, while Autumn In New York is nothing more or less ambitious than a two hanky melodrama, it's not nearly as bad as it could have been.
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Something New is something old and very familiar. This is an opposites attract romantic comedy, with a racial twist thrown in to add a little spice. Actually, these days, with mixed race relationships becoming commonplace, it's debatable how big a "twist" this is. 30 or 40 years ago, a movie about a black character dating a white one was radical. Today, it doesn't raise an eyebrow. Society's views have changed to the degree where it has become possible to use the premise of the serious Look Who's Coming to Dinner for the sit com-ish Guess Who.
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Ice Age: The Meltdown
Despite its popularity with children, Ice Age represented, at the time, a nadir for digital animation. Although entertaining, the film couldn't stand toe-to-toe with its Pixar and Dreamworks competitors. Ice Age: The Meltdown represents a further step backwards. Although the animation has improved, the regression is keenly felt in other areas - particularly the story. This is a lackluster film that exists exclusively because its predecessor made money.
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Your Friends and Neighbors
For his second feature, director Neil LaBute ventures across a domestic landscape that is no less dark than the world of corporate backstabbing he visited with In the Company of Men. Those looking for something lightweight or feel-good need not bother with Your Friends and Neighbors, a slow-moving, often disturbing look at miscommunication between the sexes, dysfunctional personalities, and the disintegration of relationships. The film contains enough humor to qualify it as a black comedy, but, underneath all the dialogue, Your Friends and Neighbors offers a bleak message about life and love in an era of growing emotional isolation.
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It's not often that a slasher/thriller is released by a recognized distributor of art-house fare (in this case, Sony Pictures Classics), but that's the case with Mute Witness. Of course, it's somewhat unfair to pigeon-hole this movie by using the word "slasher", since that term conjures images of Friday the Thirteenth, and this picture aims considerably higher. In approach and execution, if not in content, Mute Witness belongs in the same category as another low-budget edge-of-the-seater: The Stepfather.
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I happened to catch a trailer for the straight-to-video Snow Buddies tacked on to the end of another Disney DVD. I had heard of Air Bud, but honestly had no idea that these doggie "Buddy" movies were a whole franchise into themselves. Without the baggage of having sat through the half-dozen other pup movies in the series, I still found myself slack-jawed and smiling at the trailer for this live-action sled-dog puppy adventure, even though the dogs moved their lips and talked like children.
Yes, super-creepy, I'll admit. The only CGI-lipped talking-animal movies that have ever worked in my book are Babe and its sequel Pig in the City. And in Snow Buddies, when they start talking, especially with horrid affected lingos (like the hip-hop spewin' B-Dawg, a new-agey pup named Bud-Dha that says "namaste", etc.) it is THIS close to intolerable.
Then you kinda get used to it.
Then you don't notice it.
It's Disney magic!
Snow Buddies takes a pack of golden retriever puppies from their comfortable home in Fernfield, Washington (yay! Washington State!) and drops them (literally) in Ferntiuktuk, Alaska via an ice cream delivery. There is much fun to be had with the discovery of snow (which doesn't taste like ice cream), the fun of sleeping in a snow cave, and the excitement of meeting a wise old sled dog named Talon (voiced by Kris Kristofferson!).
The human hero in the story is a cute, floppy-haired boy named Adam (Dominic Scott Kay) who desperately wants a sled-dog team, but his father had covered the sled permanently with a tarp since The Accident. Adam prays for five dogs to join his husky pup Shasta so he can have a real team and enter the famous sled-dog race in town. When Shasta (voiced by Dylan Sprouse) brings home the golden retriever pups, his prayers have been answered! But first, Adam has to discreetly train his new team, enter the race in secret, and then ultimately face-off against the evil French-Canadian musher Jean George (John Kapelos—Holy crap! It's Carl the Janitor from The Breakfast Club!) and a handful of international teams (including a Russian with a hammer and sickle logo on his sleeve... um, what year is this?).
Though the parents are as bland as models on a Bounty commercial, and the dog-lips are genuinely creepy, Snow Buddies is actually pretty harmless and cute entertainment for younger kids. It is nowhere near as wretched as Snow Dogs, and doesn't contain any of the emotional trauma of Eight Below (sob!). And heck, even I'll admit I laughed out loud to hear Jean George's evil lead sled-dogs speak in exaggerated French accents (one of them voiced by Lothaire Bluteau of Jesus of Montreal!). With the support of surprisingly recognizable actors doing the critter voices, from Jim Belushi to Whoopi Goldberg to Molly Shannon, Snow Buddies is actually more enjoyable, in a completely benign way, than I ever expected.
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The future seems bright for Kevin Burke, a security expert for the large multi-national company Jorgensen Financial. Hes just been promoted and is about to propose marriage to his girlfriend Rosalind. But that all changes when Rosalind is murdered before his eyes by a professional hitman. While tracking down her killers Kevin finds himself chased by mob hit-woman Tessa, his co-workers Junior and Mr Ficks and the police. Burkes mentor and employer Karl Jorgensen, enigmatic though supportive, seems to hold the key to the mystery.
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Elder Aaron Davis (Steve Sandvoss), a young Mormon from Pocatello, Idaho, is sent to Los Angeles with three other missionaries to spread the Mormon faith. They move into an apartment next to openly gay party boy Christian Markelli (Wes Ramsey) and his roommate Julie, an aspiring singer. Christian and Julie work as waiters at Lila's, a trendy restaurant owned by retired actress Lila Montagne (Jacqueline Bisset).
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Tom Armstrong (Sean Patrick Flanery) is a cop in Albuquerque, New Mexico, and his partner is Ryan Alba (Greg Serano). Tom has made it his life's work to locate a hit man known as the Lion. Tom has studied the Lion, and knows him better than anyone else in law enforcement does.
The Lion is no ordinary assassin. He is intelligent and has the ability to transform his appearance into many different people. His disguises allow him access to buildings that serve his purpose.
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Larry the Cable Guy: Tailgate Party
Larry was part of the highly successful concert Blue Collar Comedy Tour with Jeff Foxworthy and Bill Engvall. The tours success led to Blue Collar Comedy Tour, The Movie, which premiered on Comedy Central and at the time was the highest rated movie in the channels history. The sequel Blue Collar Comedy Tour Rides Again is the 3rd most watched telecast in Comedy Centrals history. The Blue Collar boys reunited to shoot Blue Collar Comedy Tour, One For The Road in Washington, DC at the Warner Theater.
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Cross of Iron
In 1943, in the Russian front, the decorated leader Rolf Steiner is promoted to Sergeant after another successful mission. Meanwhile the upper-class and arrogant Prussian Captain Hauptmann Stransky is assigned as the new commander of his squad. After a bloody battle of Steiners squad against the Russian troops led by the brave Lieutenant Meyer that dies in the combat, the coward Stransky claims that he led his squad against the Russian and requests to be awarded with the Iron of Cross to satisfy his personal ambition together with his aristocratic family. Stransky gives the names of Steiner and of the homosexual Lieutenant Triebig as witnesses of his accomplishment, but Steiner, who has problems with the chain of command in the army and with the arrogance of Stransky, refuses to participate in the fraud. When Colonel Brandt gives the order to leave the position in the front, Stransky does not retransmit the order to Steiners squad, and they are left alone surrounded by the enemy and having to fight to survive.
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At First Sight
A driven Manhattan architect, Amy, relaxes at a resort and falls for the masseur, Virgil, blind since age 3 and assisted by his spinster sister. He helps Amy hear and sense the world, giving her new spirit and a burst of creativity. Over the sisters objections, Amy takes Virgil to New York for new, radical surgery. He regains his sight. Hes disoriented and must learn to process these new images. Finding his place in a seeing world strains his relation with Amy his absent father wants to connect with him now that he can see then, retinal disease threatens to undo the surgery. Can love survive, will he find his new place and his old tranquillity, can Amy accommodate limits?
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Confessions of a Window Cleaner
Young Timmy starts as a window cleaner in the little company of his brother. Soon he learns that some female customers expect additional service. Young and curious as he is, he reluctantly accepts the juicy duty. However his heart belongs to Liz, who demands the highest commitment until she lets him go all the way.
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